March 29, 2026
0608 Female Led Relationships: Healthy Submission vs Codependency
Sadly I cannot respond directly to your text, so please Email me! This episode came straight out of a conversation inside the FKRSkool.com community — and it’s a good one. The question was simple, but loaded: How do you know if what you’re experiencing is healthy submission… or codependency? So we broke it down. Codependency, by definition, is rooted in low self-esteem, poor boundaries, and relying on another person for identity and validation. It often shows up as losing yourself in someone ...
Sadly I cannot respond directly to your text, so please Email me!
This episode came straight out of a conversation inside the FKRSkool.com community — and it’s a good one.
The question was simple, but loaded:
How do you know if what you’re experiencing is healthy submission… or codependency?
So we broke it down.
Codependency, by definition, is rooted in low self-esteem, poor boundaries, and relying on another person for identity and validation. It often shows up as losing yourself in someone else, neglecting your own needs, and not being able to function independently.
Submission in a female-led relationship is something completely different.
A submissive partner still has independence. Still has awareness. Still has the ability to take care of themselves if life throws something unexpected your way. The dynamic is chosen — not clung to out of fear or lack of self-worth.
We also talk about:
- Why communication and boundaries are foundational in a healthy FLR
- The misconception that submissive equals weak (it doesn’t)
- Why real submission actually requires self-awareness and strength
- How trust — not dependence — holds a power exchange together
- The difference between emotional attachment vs losing yourself completely
One of the biggest takeaways?
If your partner disappeared tomorrow, would you fall apart emotionally… or would you be unable to function at all?
That answer says a lot.
This episode isn’t about labeling your relationship.
It’s about understanding the difference between choosing to submit and needing someone to survive emotionally.
Want to keep this conversation going?
Join us inside FLRSkool.com — where real couples are having real conversations about female-led relationships, power exchange, chastity, and everything in between.
Full video versions of the podcast are now exclusively available inside Skool.
And if you’ve supported me on Patreon in the past… DM me there. I’ve got you.
https://www.krystinekellogg.com/
Email Me! KrystineKellogg@Gmail.com
Keywords:
domestic discipline, female led relationship dynamics, accountability, communication, people pleaser, personal growth, female led relationship challenges, discipline strategies, humor in relationships, shared growth, female led relationship advice, discipline and play, understanding in partnerships, personal anecdotes, physical touch, relationship rules, partnership growth, podcast insights, female-led relationships, submissive rewards, holiday appreciation, partner devotion, relationship dynamics,, control and appreciation, partner confidence, submissive devotion, unique dynamics, balance of control, partner nurturing, relationship empowerment, submissive strength.pegging, female-led relationship, kink, empowerment, dominance, submission, ass play, emotional connection, intimacy, power pla...
Transcript
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This podcast is intended for mature audiences only. If you are not 18 years of age or older, there are thousands of other podcasts you can listen to and you can come back and visit us when you are 18. This podcast is meant solely for entertainment. We are not licensed doctors, lawyers, or therapists. We simply have a fascination with the lifestyle and would love to share it with you and get your thoughts and opinions.
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Really quick, lack of boundaries. I feel like as we've discussed in the courses at F-L-S-K-O-O-L dot com.
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Welcome back.
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Again, actually, because this is take two.
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Hi, Sabi.
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Hi, how's it going?
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It's going great. I feel like your blood pressure is high.
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Just kind of defeated.
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Goosefraba.
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Yeah.
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All right. Do we have any housekeeping?
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I'm not sure when this is going to drop, but the basis for this episode actually comes from F-L-R-S-K-O-O-L dot com. It's our thing and it's a community and people are talking and asking questions and having conversation and that's the point of a community. We should probably secure this so it doesn't move, right?
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And from, I'm going to say nothing. And from this community, we've gotten a question and that is what we are going to discuss today. We are going to discuss the difference between, or if there is a difference, between codependency and being submissive. First thing we're going to do, I'm going to read the definition from the old Google master on what codependency is. Codependency is an emotional, you would never know I used to do voiceover.
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Used to.
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Codependency is an emotional, sorry.
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Not like that.
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Codependency is an emotional and behavioral condition where a person is excessively reliant on a partner. Often one with addiction or chronic illness for validation and identity reject, neglecting their own needs. It is a dysfunctional relationship pattern marked by low self-esteem, poor boundaries, and a savior complex that enables another's harmful behavior. Okay, so before I even get into the key characteristics of being codependent, I'm going to say first of all that a submissive partner is very minimally reliant when it comes to their duties. You are participating in activities very independently. Yes, you are given direction, but for us specifically, I tell you to do something. As of late, I generally don't follow you around to make sure you're doing it right. I should though.
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Oh, you're talking about dishes.
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And cooking.
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Aren't you?
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Cooking and all the things.
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Yep.
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But I have let go of that. But I mean, for the most part, when you are a submissive male in our dynamic, that is very independent. So key characteristics and behaviors, approval seeking, enabling and rescuing, lack of boundaries, low self-esteem, self-neglect, poor communication.
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So the first thing, poor communication. I don't know that that can exist. Not safely in a female-led relationship.
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No, because it's founded on that.
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Correct.
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Right. So that's a major difference right there.
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Self-neglect, I think, maybe not in all, but part of a female-led relationship. This is very stereotypical of me, but I immediately go to if we were reversed, right? And if the male was the dominant and the female was the submissive, I feel like in those dynamics, it's more common that the male requires self-care or you need to go to the gym to work out to stay healthy, you need to eat healthy, whatever the reasons for that are.
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But I feel like it can be that way in these dynamics as well.
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Absolutely.
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Even though it's switched, I think it's just more commonplace in when it's the male who's the dominant.
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I get that and that's valid. And that should absolutely be the case in this dynamic as well.
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Yes. I mean, we have gotten there. I mean, we're both working on ourselves.
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Both us specifically, but in general. I think that the dominant female should have the expectations of the submissive male to take care of themselves and self-care, personal care and all that kind of stuff.
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I also feel like low self-esteem. I don't feel like that is... Maybe it is. That's hard to say.
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And man, what a rat hole we could go down on that.
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Really quick, lack of boundaries. I feel like as we've discussed in the courses at...
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F-L-R-S-K-O-O-L dot com.
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I can't even keep a straight fucking face when you do it. I believe boundaries are at the foundation with communication.
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Absolutely.
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I believe all of that is set and I believe you're revisiting those boundaries to see if everybody's so comfortable with the ones that have been set. That's my... The enabling and rescuing, caring for, fixing or taking on the responsibilities of another person.
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That's a tough one.
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Yeah. That one might apply.
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But I think it's in a healthy way, isn't it?
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Well, because you're probably directed to do that, you know, maybe. So that's not taken on by the... Maybe it can be taken on by the submissive, I guess. That one's a little bit of a gray area. But for the most part, they are two very different things according to the definition of each.
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Well, let's look at what is the definition of submissive. It's thinking. Google's AI is slow. Submissive describes a person inclined to yield to the authority, will or control of others characterized by being obedient, passive or compliant. It applies a lack of resistance, often displaying meekness or humility in relationships or in response to direction.
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So just from reading that definition.
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It's more controlled.
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Mm hmm. Lack of resistance. Here's the thing. Often displaying meekness. I have ranted about this on podcasts in the past. Like, I just feel like everybody views submissive as being weak. And I have never thought you were weak. I may call you a pussy, but I don't think you are. Stop being such a pussy.
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Yeah. I mean, I don't mind. Yeah. Contrary to what most people would believe, a submissive person can actually be a very strong person.
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I think you have to be to be a submissive.
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To submit to somebody else, you actually have to have some pretty good self-control. Some pretty good, a pretty good view of yourself.
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To be very self-aware.
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Self-aware. Yes. In order and mature enough to make that decision. Right. Now, there is a difference between a good, healthy FLR and a drooling, sniveling something or other on whatever social media that, you know, will comment or do anything for you.
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It's all about the fantasy. It's not the action.
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There are two different, really different things. Right.
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And that doesn't mean you can't have a fantasy FLR either, if that's what you're looking for. But that wasn't the point of what you were saying.
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But yeah, but this is that's a one and.
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Right. But this is just a well, basically, it's just a need to get your dick wet.
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Yeah. Really?
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Or not. Right.
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Just be punished.
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Well, yeah, whatever the jizz that comes out of it when you jack off about it.
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You know what I mean? But that's all it is to those to those.
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They don't because this is just a rant.
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So I'm not going to go on.
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But the little bit that what they are, what is available to most guys is incorrect information. What a real FLR is or can be.
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I agree with everything you just said.
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Oh, just kidding.
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A little golf clap for you.
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That's like, you know, when they do that at the poetry where they're snapping.
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Oh, yeah. Anyway, sorry.
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That was my little rant.
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OK, here is the actual question.
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Thank you for who posted it.
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How do you all know what you're doing is submissive as opposed to codependent?
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I'm asking out of ignorance and struggle, not out of judgment.
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Clarifying this as text without tone loses so much context.
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Yes, I get that.
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That's the one disadvantage of.
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FLR school, FLR, SKOL dot com.
00:10:04.399 --> 00:10:08.320
Yeah, that is the disadvantage of this.
00:10:08.580 --> 00:10:10.139
It's hard to do the text.
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I appreciate how that question was worded.
00:10:13.419 --> 00:10:28.379
I think since we've looked at the definitions of both, I just think reading and this is, again, just a Google definition, is there a clinical definition somewhere that probably implies that they are more similar than what they maybe really are?
00:10:28.820 --> 00:10:33.480
There are some similar I mean, you know, outwardly there would be some similarities, I guess. Yes. Right.
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But when you when you break it down like like you have with the definitions, there are drastic differences.
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I hate to keep saying this, but it's also mentioned in the courses.
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At the end of the day, life happens and you could lose your partner or health could take over or whatever the case may be.
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Right. So the submissive still has to have the ability to care for himself.
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Yes. Himself being like we are talking female led relationship.
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And I feel like a codependent, if it was a codependency, the if being submissive was codependent, the submissive man would not be able to care for himself in the event of an emergency or a health issue or whatever.
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They would fall apart because they wouldn't know what to do.
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Absolutely.
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So I think that is a big difference.
00:11:23.740 --> 00:11:28.480
Yep. If I if something was to happen to me, you would be just fine.
00:11:28.580 --> 00:11:31.120
Right. I mean, your world would shatter.
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It would. No, but I mean, be serious.
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I would be able to move on.
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Yes. It would be a struggle.
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Yes. Right. Just for emotional reasons, not for logistical reason.
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Right. Right. A codependent person might have problems with the logistical reasons also.
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That's what we're saying.
00:11:48.899 --> 00:11:49.879
That's correct. Yeah.
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OK, I mean, at one point, I think I thought I was codependent, but I 100 percent have solidly always been able to take care of myself because I had no other choice.
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OK, and you literally take care of.
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Right. You've taken care of yourself and other relationships.
00:12:08.840 --> 00:12:11.879
Yes. You know, family, men, all the things.
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Yes, that is valid.
00:12:13.460 --> 00:12:14.179
So, yeah.
00:12:15.740 --> 00:12:17.259
Well, I just feel better about myself.
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Sometimes I thought I was codependent, but fuck, I am not.
00:12:19.820 --> 00:12:24.419
No. And listen, this is just two people sitting in a room talking.
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And we may be way the fuck off base, right?
00:12:28.700 --> 00:12:30.980
But this makes sense to us what we're saying.
00:12:32.139 --> 00:12:33.679
Please find your own information.
00:12:34.279 --> 00:12:35.860
Yes. Please find your own information.
00:12:37.820 --> 00:12:40.019
You can listen to us if you want, and that's OK.
00:12:40.220 --> 00:12:43.559
Yes. But qualify it.
00:12:44.220 --> 00:12:47.139
Right. I mean, and I simply just did a Google search.
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It's just a Google definition of what codependency is.
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I again, I feel like.
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We are both very capable of taking care of ourselves, should that need arise, which leads me to believe that we are not codependent on each other, that is the biggest. Correct.
00:13:03.460 --> 00:13:12.519
Right. There are nights when I say to you in our nightly thing, whatever we call that, not mantra, but devotional.
00:13:13.179 --> 00:13:15.980
Yeah. My nightly thing before we ritual ritual.
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Yeah. Whatever. Every night.
00:13:21.059 --> 00:13:25.419
There are there are some of those nights where I will say that I'm addicted to you.
00:13:26.940 --> 00:13:28.639
But that's. Yeah.
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But that's good. That's because I really like being around you.
00:13:34.100 --> 00:13:37.320
Right. That's what I I like interacting with you.
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I like being led by you.
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I like discussing things with you.
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I like joking with you, all the things I like, all those things.
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I am a kind of not definition textbook addicted, probably. But I just really like I like us.
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I do, too. You know, which is good because we live in a very small space.
00:14:00.039 --> 00:14:02.460
And we've been doing it just fine for a few years now.
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Yeah. A couple of years. Yeah.
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Several years, whatever.
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However long it's been.
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Long, strange trip.
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Every day is a Saturday.
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Not true. Only to one person in the bus.
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Yes. Not to the other two.
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Correct. He's 16.
00:14:18.899 --> 00:14:20.940
Anyway, you were going to say something.
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Certainly we can go over this again.
00:14:23.500 --> 00:14:27.379
Right. Certainly there could be questions on top of that question.
00:14:27.500 --> 00:14:35.720
Right. So please, all the comments, all the emails, all the DMs, whatever it is.
00:14:36.059 --> 00:14:38.039
Let's talk more about this.
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Right. All any of these episodes.
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We do. Let's talk more.
00:14:42.460 --> 00:14:43.399
And if you have an opinion.
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Absolutely. You listening.
00:14:45.379 --> 00:14:51.980
If you have an opinion about what we've discussed or your two cents or a buck, 50, whatever it is to add to this.
00:14:52.080 --> 00:14:53.580
We love talking points.
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We love we love the comments and the questions that we're getting on school.
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Yep. Because it's oh, sorry.
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Sorry, because it just go.
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You don't have to say it.
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FLRSKOOL.com.
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I went to school for radio.
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You don't say.
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Might have brought that up a few times.
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Hey, do you ever do that?
00:15:16.200 --> 00:15:17.360
Any tile at Wal-Mart?
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I did. By Lakeville.
00:15:19.379 --> 00:15:21.139
Yep. Anyway.
00:15:21.960 --> 00:15:22.759
And who's it?
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We appreciate the feedback, the questions, the conversation starters, all of that that are occurring.
00:15:29.279 --> 00:15:30.200
Yes. At school.
00:15:30.519 --> 00:15:34.600
Yes. And not for our selfish reasons, but for.
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But because these things need to be talked about, right, and if and if the question comes up on the school community and we talk about it and we cut socials for these and they go up on the tick tock and the Instagram and the fucking Twitter.
00:15:52.980 --> 00:15:56.539
Right. Somebody watching might see that.
00:15:56.679 --> 00:15:59.279
Right. And start their own conversation.
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That's really what we're trying to do.
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This podcast is for informational purposes only.
00:16:05.919 --> 00:16:08.480
Yeah. We have a disclaimer.
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I did not go to broadcasting school.
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I went.
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She does really well.
00:16:13.580 --> 00:16:15.759
I went to. Hey there, big fella.
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Porn school.
00:16:17.820 --> 00:16:18.360
No, no.
00:16:18.879 --> 00:16:22.059
Because you've done voiceover, you could totally do radio and have fun with it.
00:16:22.279 --> 00:16:23.059
Yeah, it would be fun.
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I do like a mic in front of my face.
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Yep. If only I liked a dick in front of my face.
00:16:28.419 --> 00:16:29.220
Not anymore.
00:16:30.759 --> 00:16:35.200
Anyway, not the point of the podcast currently.
00:16:35.440 --> 00:16:35.860
Was there anything?
00:16:36.059 --> 00:16:36.240
Yeah.
00:16:37.779 --> 00:16:40.820
Valid. Is there anything else that you want to talk about on this one?
00:16:40.980 --> 00:16:41.299
I don't know.
00:16:41.460 --> 00:16:44.360
We've talked this one out a little bit, but again, please.
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Any feedback? Let us know.
00:16:45.720 --> 00:16:47.419
You can do it at the.
00:16:48.519 --> 00:16:54.759
Well, you can do it on the socials, right, or school or school or whatever, just in case you missed it.
00:16:55.470 --> 00:16:59.200
F L R S K O O L.
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Dot com.
00:17:02.019 --> 00:17:04.279
You sound like Casey Kasem when you say the dot com.
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I do that on purpose.
00:17:05.299 --> 00:17:05.559
I know.
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Any or you can email me at Christine Kellogg at gmail.com.
00:17:12.838 --> 00:17:16.480
K R Y S T I N E K E L L O G G.
00:17:17.480 --> 00:17:18.640
At gmail.com.
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If only you knew how hard that was for me.
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Thanks for listening to my podcast.
00:17:25.858 --> 00:17:27.338
Oh, take that out.
00:17:27.539 --> 00:17:27.920
Sad.
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We don't have any nuggets.
00:17:30.500 --> 00:17:31.319
There's no Easter egg.
00:17:32.880 --> 00:17:34.920
We didn't mention.
00:17:35.440 --> 00:17:37.099
Well, I'm sure Judy would listen to this.
00:17:37.180 --> 00:17:38.339
So there's your Easter egg.
00:17:39.619 --> 00:17:40.420
Hi, Judy.
00:17:40.539 --> 00:17:41.180
Hi, Steve.
00:17:43.140 --> 00:17:43.960
Is that it?
00:17:44.539 --> 00:17:45.279
Are we done?
00:17:45.420 --> 00:17:45.859
I think so.
00:17:46.039 --> 00:17:46.519
Stay safe.
00:17:46.640 --> 00:17:47.099
Be kind.
00:17:47.299 --> 00:17:47.940
Stay healthy.
00:17:48.599 --> 00:17:49.660
I love you all.
00:17:50.460 --> 00:17:50.700
Mwah.
00:17:51.220 --> 00:17:51.640
Can we come in?
00:00:03.870 --> 00:00:27.710
This podcast is intended for mature audiences only. If you are not 18 years of age or older, there are thousands of other podcasts you can listen to and you can come back and visit us when you are 18. This podcast is meant solely for entertainment. We are not licensed doctors, lawyers, or therapists. We simply have a fascination with the lifestyle and would love to share it with you and get your thoughts and opinions.
00:00:29.390 --> 00:00:39.070
Really quick, lack of boundaries. I feel like as we've discussed in the courses at F-L-S-K-O-O-L dot com.
00:00:51.039 --> 00:00:52.000
Welcome back.
00:00:53.140 --> 00:00:55.320
Again, actually, because this is take two.
00:00:55.579 --> 00:00:56.039
Hi, Sabi.
00:00:56.140 --> 00:00:56.799
Hi, how's it going?
00:00:57.079 --> 00:00:59.579
It's going great. I feel like your blood pressure is high.
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Just kind of defeated.
00:01:03.598 --> 00:01:04.079
Goosefraba.
00:01:04.680 --> 00:01:04.920
Yeah.
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All right. Do we have any housekeeping?
00:01:10.640 --> 00:01:37.569
I'm not sure when this is going to drop, but the basis for this episode actually comes from F-L-R-S-K-O-O-L dot com. It's our thing and it's a community and people are talking and asking questions and having conversation and that's the point of a community. We should probably secure this so it doesn't move, right?
00:01:37.569 --> 00:02:07.709
And from, I'm going to say nothing. And from this community, we've gotten a question and that is what we are going to discuss today. We are going to discuss the difference between, or if there is a difference, between codependency and being submissive. First thing we're going to do, I'm going to read the definition from the old Google master on what codependency is. Codependency is an emotional, you would never know I used to do voiceover.
00:02:08.650 --> 00:02:09.210
Used to.
00:02:09.569 --> 00:02:12.569
Codependency is an emotional, sorry.
00:02:12.729 --> 00:02:13.330
Not like that.
00:02:13.449 --> 00:03:12.099
Codependency is an emotional and behavioral condition where a person is excessively reliant on a partner. Often one with addiction or chronic illness for validation and identity reject, neglecting their own needs. It is a dysfunctional relationship pattern marked by low self-esteem, poor boundaries, and a savior complex that enables another's harmful behavior. Okay, so before I even get into the key characteristics of being codependent, I'm going to say first of all that a submissive partner is very minimally reliant when it comes to their duties. You are participating in activities very independently. Yes, you are given direction, but for us specifically, I tell you to do something. As of late, I generally don't follow you around to make sure you're doing it right. I should though.
00:03:12.500 --> 00:03:13.979
Oh, you're talking about dishes.
00:03:15.479 --> 00:03:16.199
And cooking.
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Aren't you?
00:03:16.560 --> 00:03:17.639
Cooking and all the things.
00:03:17.800 --> 00:03:17.960
Yep.
00:03:18.120 --> 00:03:37.860
But I have let go of that. But I mean, for the most part, when you are a submissive male in our dynamic, that is very independent. So key characteristics and behaviors, approval seeking, enabling and rescuing, lack of boundaries, low self-esteem, self-neglect, poor communication.
00:03:38.879 --> 00:03:48.639
So the first thing, poor communication. I don't know that that can exist. Not safely in a female-led relationship.
00:03:48.860 --> 00:03:50.659
No, because it's founded on that.
00:03:50.680 --> 00:03:51.020
Correct.
00:03:51.020 --> 00:03:53.560
Right. So that's a major difference right there.
00:03:54.060 --> 00:04:27.930
Self-neglect, I think, maybe not in all, but part of a female-led relationship. This is very stereotypical of me, but I immediately go to if we were reversed, right? And if the male was the dominant and the female was the submissive, I feel like in those dynamics, it's more common that the male requires self-care or you need to go to the gym to work out to stay healthy, you need to eat healthy, whatever the reasons for that are.
00:04:28.509 --> 00:04:31.649
But I feel like it can be that way in these dynamics as well.
00:04:32.009 --> 00:04:32.250
Absolutely.
00:04:32.350 --> 00:04:36.930
Even though it's switched, I think it's just more commonplace in when it's the male who's the dominant.
00:04:37.889 --> 00:04:43.490
I get that and that's valid. And that should absolutely be the case in this dynamic as well.
00:04:43.490 --> 00:04:48.329
Yes. I mean, we have gotten there. I mean, we're both working on ourselves.
00:04:48.689 --> 00:05:01.209
Both us specifically, but in general. I think that the dominant female should have the expectations of the submissive male to take care of themselves and self-care, personal care and all that kind of stuff.
00:05:01.490 --> 00:05:10.110
I also feel like low self-esteem. I don't feel like that is... Maybe it is. That's hard to say.
00:05:10.110 --> 00:05:15.069
And man, what a rat hole we could go down on that.
00:05:15.509 --> 00:05:21.110
Really quick, lack of boundaries. I feel like as we've discussed in the courses at...
00:05:21.110 --> 00:05:24.870
F-L-R-S-K-O-O-L dot com.
00:05:28.220 --> 00:05:35.000
I can't even keep a straight fucking face when you do it. I believe boundaries are at the foundation with communication.
00:05:35.259 --> 00:05:35.560
Absolutely.
00:05:35.560 --> 00:05:50.699
I believe all of that is set and I believe you're revisiting those boundaries to see if everybody's so comfortable with the ones that have been set. That's my... The enabling and rescuing, caring for, fixing or taking on the responsibilities of another person.
00:05:54.790 --> 00:05:55.769
That's a tough one.
00:05:56.009 --> 00:05:57.949
Yeah. That one might apply.
00:05:59.009 --> 00:06:01.230
But I think it's in a healthy way, isn't it?
00:06:01.410 --> 00:06:24.410
Well, because you're probably directed to do that, you know, maybe. So that's not taken on by the... Maybe it can be taken on by the submissive, I guess. That one's a little bit of a gray area. But for the most part, they are two very different things according to the definition of each.
00:06:24.850 --> 00:06:57.019
Well, let's look at what is the definition of submissive. It's thinking. Google's AI is slow. Submissive describes a person inclined to yield to the authority, will or control of others characterized by being obedient, passive or compliant. It applies a lack of resistance, often displaying meekness or humility in relationships or in response to direction.
00:06:58.040 --> 00:07:02.560
So just from reading that definition.
00:07:03.939 --> 00:07:05.720
It's more controlled.
00:07:05.720 --> 00:07:30.560
Mm hmm. Lack of resistance. Here's the thing. Often displaying meekness. I have ranted about this on podcasts in the past. Like, I just feel like everybody views submissive as being weak. And I have never thought you were weak. I may call you a pussy, but I don't think you are. Stop being such a pussy.
00:07:30.560 --> 00:07:39.839
Yeah. I mean, I don't mind. Yeah. Contrary to what most people would believe, a submissive person can actually be a very strong person.
00:07:40.339 --> 00:07:41.939
I think you have to be to be a submissive.
00:07:42.759 --> 00:07:54.819
To submit to somebody else, you actually have to have some pretty good self-control. Some pretty good, a pretty good view of yourself.
00:07:56.120 --> 00:07:57.220
To be very self-aware.
00:07:57.220 --> 00:08:23.180
Self-aware. Yes. In order and mature enough to make that decision. Right. Now, there is a difference between a good, healthy FLR and a drooling, sniveling something or other on whatever social media that, you know, will comment or do anything for you.
00:08:23.699 --> 00:08:26.060
It's all about the fantasy. It's not the action.
00:08:26.060 --> 00:08:28.839
There are two different, really different things. Right.
00:08:29.279 --> 00:08:34.720
And that doesn't mean you can't have a fantasy FLR either, if that's what you're looking for. But that wasn't the point of what you were saying.
00:08:35.000 --> 00:08:36.678
But yeah, but this is that's a one and.
00:08:37.139 --> 00:08:43.519
Right. But this is just a well, basically, it's just a need to get your dick wet.
00:08:43.620 --> 00:08:44.379
Yeah. Really?
00:08:44.600 --> 00:08:45.480
Or not. Right.
00:08:45.559 --> 00:08:46.360
Just be punished.
00:08:46.500 --> 00:08:50.720
Well, yeah, whatever the jizz that comes out of it when you jack off about it.
00:08:51.039 --> 00:08:54.179
You know what I mean? But that's all it is to those to those.
00:08:54.179 --> 00:08:58.740
They don't because this is just a rant.
00:08:58.879 --> 00:08:59.840
So I'm not going to go on.
00:09:00.259 --> 00:09:13.980
But the little bit that what they are, what is available to most guys is incorrect information. What a real FLR is or can be.
00:09:14.240 --> 00:09:16.720
I agree with everything you just said.
00:09:16.919 --> 00:09:19.899
Oh, just kidding.
00:09:20.120 --> 00:09:22.340
A little golf clap for you.
00:09:22.379 --> 00:09:25.259
That's like, you know, when they do that at the poetry where they're snapping.
00:09:25.259 --> 00:09:30.600
Oh, yeah. Anyway, sorry.
00:09:30.720 --> 00:09:31.620
That was my little rant.
00:09:32.960 --> 00:09:34.639
OK, here is the actual question.
00:09:34.879 --> 00:09:37.100
Thank you for who posted it.
00:09:38.419 --> 00:09:43.919
How do you all know what you're doing is submissive as opposed to codependent?
00:09:44.240 --> 00:09:47.899
I'm asking out of ignorance and struggle, not out of judgment.
00:09:48.940 --> 00:09:54.100
Clarifying this as text without tone loses so much context.
00:09:54.320 --> 00:09:55.779
Yes, I get that.
00:09:55.779 --> 00:09:57.679
That's the one disadvantage of.
00:09:59.440 --> 00:10:04.179
FLR school, FLR, SKOL dot com.
00:10:04.399 --> 00:10:08.320
Yeah, that is the disadvantage of this.
00:10:08.580 --> 00:10:10.139
It's hard to do the text.
00:10:10.559 --> 00:10:12.200
I appreciate how that question was worded.
00:10:13.419 --> 00:10:28.379
I think since we've looked at the definitions of both, I just think reading and this is, again, just a Google definition, is there a clinical definition somewhere that probably implies that they are more similar than what they maybe really are?
00:10:28.820 --> 00:10:33.480
There are some similar I mean, you know, outwardly there would be some similarities, I guess. Yes. Right.
00:10:33.899 --> 00:10:39.580
But when you when you break it down like like you have with the definitions, there are drastic differences.
00:10:40.100 --> 00:10:43.039
I hate to keep saying this, but it's also mentioned in the courses.
00:10:44.019 --> 00:10:52.899
At the end of the day, life happens and you could lose your partner or health could take over or whatever the case may be.
00:10:53.159 --> 00:11:00.240
Right. So the submissive still has to have the ability to care for himself.
00:11:00.620 --> 00:11:03.759
Yes. Himself being like we are talking female led relationship.
00:11:04.120 --> 00:11:17.700
And I feel like a codependent, if it was a codependency, the if being submissive was codependent, the submissive man would not be able to care for himself in the event of an emergency or a health issue or whatever.
00:11:17.799 --> 00:11:20.440
They would fall apart because they wouldn't know what to do.
00:11:20.539 --> 00:11:21.039
Absolutely.
00:11:21.600 --> 00:11:23.580
So I think that is a big difference.
00:11:23.740 --> 00:11:28.480
Yep. If I if something was to happen to me, you would be just fine.
00:11:28.580 --> 00:11:31.120
Right. I mean, your world would shatter.
00:11:31.340 --> 00:11:34.000
It would. No, but I mean, be serious.
00:11:34.120 --> 00:11:35.779
I would be able to move on.
00:11:35.940 --> 00:11:37.820
Yes. It would be a struggle.
00:11:38.139 --> 00:11:42.039
Yes. Right. Just for emotional reasons, not for logistical reason.
00:11:42.139 --> 00:11:47.340
Right. Right. A codependent person might have problems with the logistical reasons also.
00:11:47.840 --> 00:11:48.700
That's what we're saying.
00:11:48.899 --> 00:11:49.879
That's correct. Yeah.
00:11:51.039 --> 00:12:00.159
OK, I mean, at one point, I think I thought I was codependent, but I 100 percent have solidly always been able to take care of myself because I had no other choice.
00:12:00.919 --> 00:12:03.820
OK, and you literally take care of.
00:12:04.080 --> 00:12:08.519
Right. You've taken care of yourself and other relationships.
00:12:08.840 --> 00:12:11.879
Yes. You know, family, men, all the things.
00:12:11.980 --> 00:12:13.240
Yes, that is valid.
00:12:13.460 --> 00:12:14.179
So, yeah.
00:12:15.740 --> 00:12:17.259
Well, I just feel better about myself.
00:12:17.440 --> 00:12:19.820
Sometimes I thought I was codependent, but fuck, I am not.
00:12:19.820 --> 00:12:24.419
No. And listen, this is just two people sitting in a room talking.
00:12:25.580 --> 00:12:28.100
And we may be way the fuck off base, right?
00:12:28.700 --> 00:12:30.980
But this makes sense to us what we're saying.
00:12:32.139 --> 00:12:33.679
Please find your own information.
00:12:34.279 --> 00:12:35.860
Yes. Please find your own information.
00:12:37.820 --> 00:12:40.019
You can listen to us if you want, and that's OK.
00:12:40.220 --> 00:12:43.559
Yes. But qualify it.
00:12:44.220 --> 00:12:47.139
Right. I mean, and I simply just did a Google search.
00:12:47.340 --> 00:12:49.620
It's just a Google definition of what codependency is.
00:12:49.820 --> 00:12:52.179
I again, I feel like.
00:12:53.120 --> 00:13:03.200
We are both very capable of taking care of ourselves, should that need arise, which leads me to believe that we are not codependent on each other, that is the biggest. Correct.
00:13:03.460 --> 00:13:12.519
Right. There are nights when I say to you in our nightly thing, whatever we call that, not mantra, but devotional.
00:13:13.179 --> 00:13:15.980
Yeah. My nightly thing before we ritual ritual.
00:13:15.980 --> 00:13:18.460
Yeah. Whatever. Every night.
00:13:21.059 --> 00:13:25.419
There are there are some of those nights where I will say that I'm addicted to you.
00:13:26.940 --> 00:13:28.639
But that's. Yeah.
00:13:29.960 --> 00:13:33.799
But that's good. That's because I really like being around you.
00:13:34.100 --> 00:13:37.320
Right. That's what I I like interacting with you.
00:13:37.399 --> 00:13:40.240
I like being led by you.
00:13:40.340 --> 00:13:43.659
I like discussing things with you.
00:13:43.659 --> 00:13:47.379
I like joking with you, all the things I like, all those things.
00:13:47.500 --> 00:13:55.580
I am a kind of not definition textbook addicted, probably. But I just really like I like us.
00:13:55.899 --> 00:13:59.480
I do, too. You know, which is good because we live in a very small space.
00:14:00.039 --> 00:14:02.460
And we've been doing it just fine for a few years now.
00:14:02.539 --> 00:14:03.740
Yeah. A couple of years. Yeah.
00:14:03.960 --> 00:14:05.039
Several years, whatever.
00:14:05.399 --> 00:14:06.460
However long it's been.
00:14:07.559 --> 00:14:08.740
Long, strange trip.
00:14:09.000 --> 00:14:09.960
Every day is a Saturday.
00:14:11.159 --> 00:14:14.080
Not true. Only to one person in the bus.
00:14:14.679 --> 00:14:16.360
Yes. Not to the other two.
00:14:16.500 --> 00:14:18.600
Correct. He's 16.
00:14:18.899 --> 00:14:20.940
Anyway, you were going to say something.
00:14:21.059 --> 00:14:22.799
Certainly we can go over this again.
00:14:23.500 --> 00:14:27.379
Right. Certainly there could be questions on top of that question.
00:14:27.500 --> 00:14:35.720
Right. So please, all the comments, all the emails, all the DMs, whatever it is.
00:14:36.059 --> 00:14:38.039
Let's talk more about this.
00:14:38.179 --> 00:14:39.940
Right. All any of these episodes.
00:14:39.940 --> 00:14:42.120
We do. Let's talk more.
00:14:42.460 --> 00:14:43.399
And if you have an opinion.
00:14:44.120 --> 00:14:45.200
Absolutely. You listening.
00:14:45.379 --> 00:14:51.980
If you have an opinion about what we've discussed or your two cents or a buck, 50, whatever it is to add to this.
00:14:52.080 --> 00:14:53.580
We love talking points.
00:14:53.700 --> 00:14:58.019
We love we love the comments and the questions that we're getting on school.
00:14:58.740 --> 00:15:01.259
Yep. Because it's oh, sorry.
00:15:02.159 --> 00:15:03.500
Sorry, because it just go.
00:15:03.580 --> 00:15:04.440
You don't have to say it.
00:15:07.000 --> 00:15:08.039
FLRSKOOL.com.
00:15:09.440 --> 00:15:10.759
I went to school for radio.
00:15:12.480 --> 00:15:13.679
You don't say.
00:15:13.899 --> 00:15:15.360
Might have brought that up a few times.
00:15:15.419 --> 00:15:16.100
Hey, do you ever do that?
00:15:16.200 --> 00:15:17.360
Any tile at Wal-Mart?
00:15:17.559 --> 00:15:19.120
I did. By Lakeville.
00:15:19.379 --> 00:15:21.139
Yep. Anyway.
00:15:21.960 --> 00:15:22.759
And who's it?
00:15:22.879 --> 00:15:29.179
We appreciate the feedback, the questions, the conversation starters, all of that that are occurring.
00:15:29.279 --> 00:15:30.200
Yes. At school.
00:15:30.519 --> 00:15:34.600
Yes. And not for our selfish reasons, but for.
00:15:35.539 --> 00:15:52.600
But because these things need to be talked about, right, and if and if the question comes up on the school community and we talk about it and we cut socials for these and they go up on the tick tock and the Instagram and the fucking Twitter.
00:15:52.980 --> 00:15:56.539
Right. Somebody watching might see that.
00:15:56.679 --> 00:15:59.279
Right. And start their own conversation.
00:16:00.740 --> 00:16:02.860
That's really what we're trying to do.
00:16:02.860 --> 00:16:05.620
This podcast is for informational purposes only.
00:16:05.919 --> 00:16:08.480
Yeah. We have a disclaimer.
00:16:08.820 --> 00:16:11.200
I did not go to broadcasting school.
00:16:11.500 --> 00:16:11.779
I went.
00:16:12.019 --> 00:16:13.159
She does really well.
00:16:13.580 --> 00:16:15.759
I went to. Hey there, big fella.
00:16:16.720 --> 00:16:17.500
Porn school.
00:16:17.820 --> 00:16:18.360
No, no.
00:16:18.879 --> 00:16:22.059
Because you've done voiceover, you could totally do radio and have fun with it.
00:16:22.279 --> 00:16:23.059
Yeah, it would be fun.
00:16:24.259 --> 00:16:25.960
I do like a mic in front of my face.
00:16:26.080 --> 00:16:28.240
Yep. If only I liked a dick in front of my face.
00:16:28.419 --> 00:16:29.220
Not anymore.
00:16:30.759 --> 00:16:35.200
Anyway, not the point of the podcast currently.
00:16:35.440 --> 00:16:35.860
Was there anything?
00:16:36.059 --> 00:16:36.240
Yeah.
00:16:37.779 --> 00:16:40.820
Valid. Is there anything else that you want to talk about on this one?
00:16:40.980 --> 00:16:41.299
I don't know.
00:16:41.460 --> 00:16:44.360
We've talked this one out a little bit, but again, please.
00:16:44.539 --> 00:16:45.600
Any feedback? Let us know.
00:16:45.720 --> 00:16:47.419
You can do it at the.
00:16:48.519 --> 00:16:54.759
Well, you can do it on the socials, right, or school or school or whatever, just in case you missed it.
00:16:55.470 --> 00:16:59.200
F L R S K O O L.
00:17:00.700 --> 00:17:01.159
Dot com.
00:17:02.019 --> 00:17:04.279
You sound like Casey Kasem when you say the dot com.
00:17:04.279 --> 00:17:05.180
I do that on purpose.
00:17:05.299 --> 00:17:05.559
I know.
00:17:06.539 --> 00:17:12.640
Any or you can email me at Christine Kellogg at gmail.com.
00:17:12.838 --> 00:17:16.480
K R Y S T I N E K E L L O G G.
00:17:17.480 --> 00:17:18.640
At gmail.com.
00:17:19.220 --> 00:17:21.500
If only you knew how hard that was for me.
00:17:21.500 --> 00:17:24.880
Thanks for listening to my podcast.
00:17:25.858 --> 00:17:27.338
Oh, take that out.
00:17:27.539 --> 00:17:27.920
Sad.
00:17:29.079 --> 00:17:30.240
We don't have any nuggets.
00:17:30.500 --> 00:17:31.319
There's no Easter egg.
00:17:32.880 --> 00:17:34.920
We didn't mention.
00:17:35.440 --> 00:17:37.099
Well, I'm sure Judy would listen to this.
00:17:37.180 --> 00:17:38.339
So there's your Easter egg.
00:17:39.619 --> 00:17:40.420
Hi, Judy.
00:17:40.539 --> 00:17:41.180
Hi, Steve.
00:17:43.140 --> 00:17:43.960
Is that it?
00:17:44.539 --> 00:17:45.279
Are we done?
00:17:45.420 --> 00:17:45.859
I think so.
00:17:46.039 --> 00:17:46.519
Stay safe.
00:17:46.640 --> 00:17:47.099
Be kind.
00:17:47.299 --> 00:17:47.940
Stay healthy.
00:17:48.599 --> 00:17:49.660
I love you all.
00:17:50.460 --> 00:17:50.700
Mwah.
00:17:51.220 --> 00:17:51.640
Can we come in?
