April 29, 2025
0131 Female Led Relationships – When Dominants Collide: My First Cuckolding Experience
Sadly I cannot respond directly to your text, so please Email me!
///// RE-RELEASE /////
This week is a little different—I'm giving you a short storytime episode straight from the heart (and the hot mess that followed). I’m talking about one of my very first cuckolding experiences, what went wrong, how I felt, and what I learned from it all.
Spoiler: It didn’t end in some wild, kinky adventure. It ended with a miscommunication, a power struggle, and me realizing a lot about what I need (and don’t want) when it comes to this part of the lifestyle.
If you're exploring cuckolding, dealing with dominant personalities, or just trying to figure out what your own preferences really are—this one’s for you. It’s a short one, but packed with reflection and a reminder that it’s okay to want what you want—and to walk away when it doesn’t align.
What You'll Walk Away With:
- Why it’s okay to have boundaries—even if it turns someone off
- What happens when two dominants try to play in the same scene
- Why emotional safety and compatibility matter in cuckold dynamics
- How communication can make (or break) your experience
- That ghosting isn’t the answer (but sometimes it's a lesson too)
- Google-Friendly Questions This Episode Helps Answer:
- What is cuckolding in a female-led relationship?
- Can two dominants play together?
- How do I set boundaries in cuckolding dynamics?
- What do I do if I don’t like someone’s dominant energy?
- What are red flags when meeting a potential bull?
- Do you need emotional connection in cuckolding play?
- How do you start exploring cuckolding safely?
Coa
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Email Me! KrystineKellogg@Gmail.com
Want to support the podcast and be involved with the behind-the-scenes, including voting on episode topics, as well as tiptoe with me into this whole "coaching" thing. Find my Patreon HERE!
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Also, my psuedo-autobiographical audio drama podcast "Control" will "re-debut" this spring as we drop the entire first season exclusively on Patreon!
Keywords:
domestic discipline, female led relationship dynamics, accountability, communication, people pleaser, personal growth, female led r...
Transcript
WEBVTT
00:00:00.140 --> 00:00:01.399
Let's turn that on.
00:00:05.379 --> 00:00:08.800
This podcast is intended for mature audiences only.
00:00:09.199 --> 00:00:16.879
If you are not 18 years of age or older, there are thousands of other podcasts you can listen to and you can come back and visit us when you are 18.
00:00:17.500 --> 00:00:19.699
This podcast is meant solely for entertainment.
00:00:20.179 --> 00:00:23.019
We are not licensed doctors, lawyers, or therapists.
00:00:23.679 --> 00:00:29.399
We simply have a fascination with the lifestyle and I'd love to share it with you and get your thoughts and opinions.
00:00:42.060 --> 00:00:43.420
Welcome back.
00:00:43.979 --> 00:00:47.259
I believe this is episode 31.
00:00:48.420 --> 00:00:52.640
And I'm super sorry that last week there was no episode.
00:00:53.859 --> 00:00:58.280
I was on vacation and enjoying some sunny weather.
00:01:00.740 --> 00:01:03.060
This week is going to be a little story time.
00:01:03.340 --> 00:01:08.840
This is going to be just a short little episode because I would like to talk more about cuckolding.
00:01:09.819 --> 00:01:18.120
So this is going to be a little preface to what I've experienced in the cuckolding lifestyle.
00:01:19.060 --> 00:01:21.939
But first, housekeeping.
00:01:27.859 --> 00:01:41.129
Well, as you all know, or maybe don't know, we were in Florida last week.
00:01:41.310 --> 00:01:47.510
We went for about five days, two of which was drive time in a car with three kids.
00:01:47.510 --> 00:01:51.489
I still have all my hair, which is amazing.
00:01:52.870 --> 00:01:54.390
It was a lot of driving.
00:01:54.769 --> 00:01:59.650
And then us coming home was very busy as well.
00:01:59.790 --> 00:02:08.370
As soon as my Fiverr went back in office, it just blew up and I had some jobs I had to get done.
00:02:08.530 --> 00:02:10.310
My daughter had a driver's test.
00:02:10.969 --> 00:02:14.569
I'm behind the wheel, fully stressful on top of everything else.
00:02:14.569 --> 00:02:18.729
And just getting back into the routine of things.
00:02:19.050 --> 00:02:29.750
And here we are, Easter Sunday, and I'm recording the podcast because I didn't want you to go two weeks without hearing from me because I love you all.
00:02:30.770 --> 00:02:30.870
Three.
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Florida was fantastic.
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It was not the best weather.
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It was very humid.
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The sun did come out on the last day.
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So I'm thankful for that.
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We all got our little sunburn.
00:02:45.590 --> 00:02:55.289
We did explore the Pacific Pier, I believe it's called, or Panama City Pier.
00:02:55.509 --> 00:02:58.229
I can't remember exactly what it's called.
00:02:58.490 --> 00:03:01.189
But we went to Dick's Last Resort.
00:03:01.990 --> 00:03:05.729
And I'm just going to insert this funny little story time right here.
00:03:07.849 --> 00:03:11.810
I don't know if anybody out there isn't familiar with Dick's Last Resort.
00:03:11.810 --> 00:03:13.310
I'm not sure where they're all located.
00:03:13.530 --> 00:03:16.650
But you go in, and the servers are assholes to you.
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It's fantastic.
00:03:18.150 --> 00:03:22.490
They're rude, and they make you hats with sayings on them.
00:03:23.789 --> 00:03:26.750
So I have to look exactly.
00:03:27.110 --> 00:03:29.750
Our server was spot on.
00:03:30.550 --> 00:03:31.810
It was funny.
00:03:34.270 --> 00:03:39.129
So I'm going to tell you what our hats said.
00:03:40.250 --> 00:03:45.210
So my daughter said, voted best hands in the boys' locker room.
00:03:46.830 --> 00:03:50.289
And then my stepdaughter had one that said my bikini line.
00:03:50.469 --> 00:03:54.210
And she cut two holes in the hat and pulled her hair through.
00:03:56.349 --> 00:04:00.729
And my youngest son said the reason my mom's out of lotion.
00:04:01.849 --> 00:04:03.310
But here's the kicker.
00:04:04.330 --> 00:04:12.289
The waitress made a hat for my subbie that says I love when she puts the strap on on.
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How spot on is that?
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She's brilliant.
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It was fucking funny.
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Him and I were dying laughing.
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Of course, the kids had no idea what the hell that meant.
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Thank God.
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But overall, it was a fantastic experience.
00:04:29.029 --> 00:04:30.430
It was a much needed break.
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Very grounding to have my feet in the sand and play in the ocean.
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And it was just, it was some nice downtime.
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Much needed.
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All right.
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Story time.
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And this is going to be short because after the last two weeks, I'm exhausted and I need to get my brain right.
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Vacation was fantastic.
00:04:58.730 --> 00:05:03.189
It was coming back to real life that is just throwing me for a loop.
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So I have experienced a little bit of the cuckolding dynamic.
00:05:11.230 --> 00:05:21.250
And one story in specific, I want to share with you all because it was one of my very first experiences.
00:05:21.810 --> 00:05:28.910
And it really almost kind of turned me off to the whole cuckolding dynamic.
00:05:31.930 --> 00:05:42.389
So I met a gentleman who happened to be a dominant on, I believe we started messaging on Kik, but I'm not 100% sure.
00:05:42.449 --> 00:05:43.569
I can't remember for sure.
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We started chatting.
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We hit it off.
00:05:48.069 --> 00:05:50.870
He told me right away he was a dominant.
00:05:51.189 --> 00:05:57.990
He was very informative for me on how he would like to see things go.
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He was kind.
00:06:02.949 --> 00:06:07.149
Overall, it was a good experience chatting with him.
00:06:07.829 --> 00:06:13.490
He spoke grammatically correct, which is somewhat important to me.
00:06:14.009 --> 00:06:15.610
He had a great sense of humor.
00:06:15.850 --> 00:06:17.509
We seemed to hit it off very well.
00:06:18.250 --> 00:06:24.009
We decided to meet up and have dinner together.
00:06:25.310 --> 00:06:27.310
So my subbie and I set out.
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We met at our meeting place.
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My subbie sat at the same table with us.
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However, he was a little bit...
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We were in like a U-shaped booth and he was off to one side and I was nuzzled up to my new friend.
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Dinner went well.
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I ordered for my subbie.
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We had great conversation about how maybe submissives are looked upon as weak and really they're not.
00:07:00.709 --> 00:07:08.009
He discussed how he has the utmost respect for my submissive and he will respect our boundaries.
00:07:08.410 --> 00:07:13.029
He will respect our rules that we have set in place for how things will work.
00:07:13.129 --> 00:07:17.810
He was okay with my subbie being present if anything should reach the next level.
00:07:18.930 --> 00:07:20.170
He was very courteous.
00:07:20.170 --> 00:07:20.930
He was kind.
00:07:21.110 --> 00:07:21.870
He was informative.
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Again, everything was going great.
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He was rubbing my leg all through dinner.
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Overall, it was a fantastic experience.
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We finished up dinner and he walked me out to my car.
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The two of us in front and my subbie behind me.
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We hugged and had a nice kiss where my subbie was very intuitive and grabbed my phone in my purse so that both of my hands were free to enjoy the moment.
00:08:02.009 --> 00:08:06.189
It was a fantastic ending to a great dinner.
00:08:07.449 --> 00:08:11.689
We continued chatting via Kik, I believe it was.
00:08:16.389 --> 00:08:20.310
I don't know if I've said it before on the podcast.
00:08:20.430 --> 00:08:22.529
I think I have that I'm a massage therapist.
00:08:23.389 --> 00:08:30.689
He was looking for somebody that could come and give him two hour massages like every other week or whatever.
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He would pay me.
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That was actually our next meeting.
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I was going to his house to do a massage for him and my subbie and I were actually headed out of town that same day.
00:08:45.250 --> 00:08:56.190
So my subbie came with me, which general rule of thumb, my subbie is wherever I am until I am to a point where I don't feel like he needs to be there.
00:08:56.269 --> 00:08:57.490
But that's kind of our dynamic.
00:08:57.750 --> 00:08:59.370
He will almost always be there.
00:09:00.110 --> 00:09:03.590
And I can't say always because I don't know what the circumstances will be.
00:09:03.710 --> 00:09:05.929
There may be an instance where I say I don't want you there.
00:09:06.309 --> 00:09:07.269
And that's fine.
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That's acceptable.
00:09:09.090 --> 00:09:14.710
But my preference is that I want him there just because it's kind of a safety blanket.
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I just feel better knowing that he's there.
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So he came with me to do the massage.
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I do the massage.
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Everything is great.
00:09:29.090 --> 00:09:42.149
And towards the end of the massage, he gets up from my massage table after his massage and is standing there.
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I think he was naked.
00:09:44.049 --> 00:09:46.549
I don't remember exactly how all this went down.
00:09:46.850 --> 00:09:50.529
But I think what I did is I poked at his dick.
00:09:54.070 --> 00:10:00.990
And I don't remember if something was said right then or if it was afterwards, after I had left.
00:10:01.590 --> 00:10:10.929
And I think it was afterwards and I had gotten a text message from him or a message on kick saying that that was unacceptable and will not be tolerated.
00:10:11.370 --> 00:10:17.870
And he didn't appreciate me doing that.
00:10:17.970 --> 00:10:19.669
I don't remember exactly what it was.
00:10:20.450 --> 00:10:22.590
And that was kind of the end of it.
00:10:24.009 --> 00:10:26.450
So let me explain my feelings.
00:10:28.330 --> 00:10:29.149
I'm dominant.
00:10:29.610 --> 00:10:30.870
I like to be in control.
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And I don't like being told what to do.
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My initial reaction was, fuck off.
00:10:36.409 --> 00:10:37.669
I don't want anything to do with you.
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Don't tell me what I can and can't do.
00:10:40.269 --> 00:10:54.570
However, after some thought, it maybe could have been worded a little better so that, and again, it's coming all back around to me, but that's how my relationship is.
00:10:54.590 --> 00:10:55.490
It's all about me.
00:10:56.450 --> 00:10:59.909
And I think the way that he worded it rubbed me wrong.
00:11:00.309 --> 00:11:01.669
I didn't appreciate it.
00:11:02.750 --> 00:11:10.470
And I feel like maybe him being a dominant as well as me being a dominant is not a good match.
00:11:13.129 --> 00:11:18.269
But I don't feel like I maybe have enough experience in this to say that that is an absolute no-go.
00:11:18.730 --> 00:11:21.409
For me personally, it may be an actual no-go.
00:11:21.409 --> 00:11:31.730
I may not want a bull or want to mess around with somebody who is also a dominant because I feel like I struggle to put my dominant side aside.
00:11:32.769 --> 00:11:39.769
It may be a struggle for other dominants to put their dominant side aside to play.
00:11:42.809 --> 00:11:48.809
I don't know that we, I don't know that I even responded to his message, which was shitty on my part.
00:11:48.929 --> 00:11:50.750
I should have at least given him a response.
00:11:50.750 --> 00:11:54.970
But I don't believe that we've spoken since then.
00:11:57.990 --> 00:12:00.450
Here's what I learned from that experience.
00:12:01.710 --> 00:12:06.830
One, I'm very impressed with how the initial meeting went.
00:12:07.590 --> 00:12:10.529
I will probably do that for all future meetings.
00:12:10.610 --> 00:12:16.330
And I have done that with any other meetings since then, where my subbie and I both go.
00:12:16.710 --> 00:12:17.970
We meet for a drink.
00:12:18.070 --> 00:12:18.889
We meet for dinner.
00:12:18.889 --> 00:12:25.230
Whatever the case is, whatever we choose is right or whatever everybody has time for in their schedule.
00:12:26.149 --> 00:12:27.750
We have an initial meeting.
00:12:29.649 --> 00:12:34.909
And for me personally, I kind of need to get to know the person.
00:12:35.990 --> 00:12:47.129
Now I've said in the past that essentially, if I'm going to sleep with someone or be with someone else, it's going to be, they're basically like a living sex toy for me.
00:12:47.129 --> 00:12:49.889
Just basically a human toy that I play with.
00:12:49.950 --> 00:12:51.929
There's no real emotional connection.
00:12:53.110 --> 00:12:59.610
However, that being said and looking back at this situation, I feel like that's not necessarily the case.
00:13:00.450 --> 00:13:03.389
I need to have a connection with you.
00:13:04.070 --> 00:13:09.450
Not necessarily a romantic connection, but I need to like you as a human being.
00:13:10.129 --> 00:13:21.710
And in this instance specifically, we connected until he asserted his dominance and that was a turn off for me.
00:13:22.129 --> 00:13:23.929
And I kind of ghosted him.
00:13:24.389 --> 00:13:27.570
Not the right approach, which is another thing that I learned.
00:13:28.210 --> 00:13:35.710
I need to learn how to communicate with everybody openly in my life, not just my subbie.
00:13:35.710 --> 00:13:47.049
If I communicated with everybody like I communicated with my subbie, there would be so many fights that could be avoided or misunderstandings or whatever the case may be.
00:13:47.629 --> 00:13:53.230
So for me, it was a lesson in learning how to communicate, especially within the lifestyle.
00:13:55.490 --> 00:14:03.750
And learning how to assert my feelings or talk about my feelings or communicate what I want without sounding like a dick.
00:14:04.789 --> 00:14:06.789
It's okay for me to want what I want.
00:14:06.889 --> 00:14:08.850
It's okay for you to want what you want.
00:14:08.950 --> 00:14:18.370
If our two wants don't mesh, then maybe it's just not something we're not meant to play or we're not meant to do anything.
00:14:18.590 --> 00:14:27.519
Or I guess I don't really know how quite to say it, but the moral of that is it's okay for you to want what you want.
00:14:28.460 --> 00:14:30.919
Don't feel bad for wanting something specific.
00:14:30.919 --> 00:14:32.240
Everybody's different.
00:14:32.820 --> 00:14:35.460
And you will find someone.
00:14:35.639 --> 00:14:40.820
If this is something you want to explore more, it might take time.
00:14:41.039 --> 00:14:46.159
And now with COVID, obviously, be very careful.
00:14:46.639 --> 00:14:48.460
I mean, there's precautions.
00:14:48.840 --> 00:14:58.879
Everything in our life is kind of on a halt there because I don't know if I'm willing to take that risk with my mom living in our house.
00:15:01.679 --> 00:15:03.899
However, who knows what will happen.
00:15:04.480 --> 00:15:06.220
It's a crazy world we live in.
00:15:09.279 --> 00:15:14.820
But I would be interested if anybody wants to hit me up with a message or an email.
00:15:15.480 --> 00:15:21.440
Give me your thoughts on, well, just cuckolding in general.
00:15:22.179 --> 00:15:33.059
Do you have certain rules and guidelines that you stick by when participating in this area of the lifestyle?
00:15:36.240 --> 00:15:43.360
I really learned a lot from, I mean, as you heard, not a ton happened.
00:15:43.799 --> 00:15:48.620
But I learned a lot about what I'm looking for, what I want, what I don't want.
00:15:49.279 --> 00:15:53.360
And I've also learned to accept that what I want is okay.
00:15:54.019 --> 00:15:58.179
And if that doesn't mesh with that specific person, move on.
00:15:59.019 --> 00:16:00.299
There's other fish in the sea.
00:16:01.120 --> 00:16:02.659
I would love to hear your thoughts.
00:16:03.100 --> 00:16:10.740
Hit me up with some messages on your cuckolding dynamic, if it is something you participate in, or your thoughts on it.
00:16:13.570 --> 00:16:22.210
This is a shorty, but I promise, next week, things will be back on track and back to normal.
00:16:23.110 --> 00:16:23.889
I'm hoping.
00:16:25.350 --> 00:16:27.169
Camping season is upon us.
00:16:27.730 --> 00:16:28.990
I'm so excited.
00:16:30.049 --> 00:16:34.450
I'm hoping to have some people from the campground on, so stay tuned for those episodes.
00:16:34.649 --> 00:16:35.769
They will be fantastic.
00:16:38.610 --> 00:16:40.529
But that is all for this week.
00:16:40.529 --> 00:16:42.190
Short and sweet.
00:16:43.190 --> 00:16:45.370
I hope you all had a fantastic weekend.
00:16:45.750 --> 00:16:52.269
I hope everyone had a fantastic Easter, or just a fantastic Sunday, shoving your face full of food.
00:16:53.350 --> 00:16:54.190
I know I did.
00:16:54.450 --> 00:16:55.590
I'm in a food coma still.
00:16:57.909 --> 00:16:58.830
Take care.
00:17:00.049 --> 00:17:01.970
I will talk to you next week.
00:17:02.409 --> 00:17:04.868
Be safe, and be good human beings.
00:17:05.328 --> 00:17:06.368
Love you all.
00:00:00.140 --> 00:00:01.399
Let's turn that on.
00:00:05.379 --> 00:00:08.800
This podcast is intended for mature audiences only.
00:00:09.199 --> 00:00:16.879
If you are not 18 years of age or older, there are thousands of other podcasts you can listen to and you can come back and visit us when you are 18.
00:00:17.500 --> 00:00:19.699
This podcast is meant solely for entertainment.
00:00:20.179 --> 00:00:23.019
We are not licensed doctors, lawyers, or therapists.
00:00:23.679 --> 00:00:29.399
We simply have a fascination with the lifestyle and I'd love to share it with you and get your thoughts and opinions.
00:00:42.060 --> 00:00:43.420
Welcome back.
00:00:43.979 --> 00:00:47.259
I believe this is episode 31.
00:00:48.420 --> 00:00:52.640
And I'm super sorry that last week there was no episode.
00:00:53.859 --> 00:00:58.280
I was on vacation and enjoying some sunny weather.
00:01:00.740 --> 00:01:03.060
This week is going to be a little story time.
00:01:03.340 --> 00:01:08.840
This is going to be just a short little episode because I would like to talk more about cuckolding.
00:01:09.819 --> 00:01:18.120
So this is going to be a little preface to what I've experienced in the cuckolding lifestyle.
00:01:19.060 --> 00:01:21.939
But first, housekeeping.
00:01:27.859 --> 00:01:41.129
Well, as you all know, or maybe don't know, we were in Florida last week.
00:01:41.310 --> 00:01:47.510
We went for about five days, two of which was drive time in a car with three kids.
00:01:47.510 --> 00:01:51.489
I still have all my hair, which is amazing.
00:01:52.870 --> 00:01:54.390
It was a lot of driving.
00:01:54.769 --> 00:01:59.650
And then us coming home was very busy as well.
00:01:59.790 --> 00:02:08.370
As soon as my Fiverr went back in office, it just blew up and I had some jobs I had to get done.
00:02:08.530 --> 00:02:10.310
My daughter had a driver's test.
00:02:10.969 --> 00:02:14.569
I'm behind the wheel, fully stressful on top of everything else.
00:02:14.569 --> 00:02:18.729
And just getting back into the routine of things.
00:02:19.050 --> 00:02:29.750
And here we are, Easter Sunday, and I'm recording the podcast because I didn't want you to go two weeks without hearing from me because I love you all.
00:02:30.770 --> 00:02:30.870
Three.
00:02:31.530 --> 00:02:32.789
Florida was fantastic.
00:02:33.490 --> 00:02:36.490
It was not the best weather.
00:02:36.629 --> 00:02:37.490
It was very humid.
00:02:38.169 --> 00:02:40.370
The sun did come out on the last day.
00:02:40.449 --> 00:02:42.189
So I'm thankful for that.
00:02:42.189 --> 00:02:44.310
We all got our little sunburn.
00:02:45.590 --> 00:02:55.289
We did explore the Pacific Pier, I believe it's called, or Panama City Pier.
00:02:55.509 --> 00:02:58.229
I can't remember exactly what it's called.
00:02:58.490 --> 00:03:01.189
But we went to Dick's Last Resort.
00:03:01.990 --> 00:03:05.729
And I'm just going to insert this funny little story time right here.
00:03:07.849 --> 00:03:11.810
I don't know if anybody out there isn't familiar with Dick's Last Resort.
00:03:11.810 --> 00:03:13.310
I'm not sure where they're all located.
00:03:13.530 --> 00:03:16.650
But you go in, and the servers are assholes to you.
00:03:16.889 --> 00:03:17.750
It's fantastic.
00:03:18.150 --> 00:03:22.490
They're rude, and they make you hats with sayings on them.
00:03:23.789 --> 00:03:26.750
So I have to look exactly.
00:03:27.110 --> 00:03:29.750
Our server was spot on.
00:03:30.550 --> 00:03:31.810
It was funny.
00:03:34.270 --> 00:03:39.129
So I'm going to tell you what our hats said.
00:03:40.250 --> 00:03:45.210
So my daughter said, voted best hands in the boys' locker room.
00:03:46.830 --> 00:03:50.289
And then my stepdaughter had one that said my bikini line.
00:03:50.469 --> 00:03:54.210
And she cut two holes in the hat and pulled her hair through.
00:03:56.349 --> 00:04:00.729
And my youngest son said the reason my mom's out of lotion.
00:04:01.849 --> 00:04:03.310
But here's the kicker.
00:04:04.330 --> 00:04:12.289
The waitress made a hat for my subbie that says I love when she puts the strap on on.
00:04:13.530 --> 00:04:15.409
How spot on is that?
00:04:15.909 --> 00:04:16.750
She's brilliant.
00:04:17.528 --> 00:04:18.790
It was fucking funny.
00:04:19.670 --> 00:04:20.990
Him and I were dying laughing.
00:04:21.189 --> 00:04:23.810
Of course, the kids had no idea what the hell that meant.
00:04:23.889 --> 00:04:24.430
Thank God.
00:04:25.730 --> 00:04:28.689
But overall, it was a fantastic experience.
00:04:29.029 --> 00:04:30.430
It was a much needed break.
00:04:30.430 --> 00:04:36.430
Very grounding to have my feet in the sand and play in the ocean.
00:04:36.910 --> 00:04:39.329
And it was just, it was some nice downtime.
00:04:39.829 --> 00:04:40.569
Much needed.
00:04:46.290 --> 00:04:46.870
All right.
00:04:47.970 --> 00:04:48.949
Story time.
00:04:50.069 --> 00:04:56.329
And this is going to be short because after the last two weeks, I'm exhausted and I need to get my brain right.
00:04:57.110 --> 00:04:58.470
Vacation was fantastic.
00:04:58.730 --> 00:05:03.189
It was coming back to real life that is just throwing me for a loop.
00:05:04.100 --> 00:05:10.350
So I have experienced a little bit of the cuckolding dynamic.
00:05:11.230 --> 00:05:21.250
And one story in specific, I want to share with you all because it was one of my very first experiences.
00:05:21.810 --> 00:05:28.910
And it really almost kind of turned me off to the whole cuckolding dynamic.
00:05:31.930 --> 00:05:42.389
So I met a gentleman who happened to be a dominant on, I believe we started messaging on Kik, but I'm not 100% sure.
00:05:42.449 --> 00:05:43.569
I can't remember for sure.
00:05:44.670 --> 00:05:46.129
We started chatting.
00:05:46.470 --> 00:05:47.410
We hit it off.
00:05:48.069 --> 00:05:50.870
He told me right away he was a dominant.
00:05:51.189 --> 00:05:57.990
He was very informative for me on how he would like to see things go.
00:05:59.269 --> 00:06:01.949
He was kind.
00:06:02.949 --> 00:06:07.149
Overall, it was a good experience chatting with him.
00:06:07.829 --> 00:06:13.490
He spoke grammatically correct, which is somewhat important to me.
00:06:14.009 --> 00:06:15.610
He had a great sense of humor.
00:06:15.850 --> 00:06:17.509
We seemed to hit it off very well.
00:06:18.250 --> 00:06:24.009
We decided to meet up and have dinner together.
00:06:25.310 --> 00:06:27.310
So my subbie and I set out.
00:06:27.310 --> 00:06:29.029
We met at our meeting place.
00:06:29.750 --> 00:06:32.189
My subbie sat at the same table with us.
00:06:32.310 --> 00:06:35.949
However, he was a little bit...
00:06:35.949 --> 00:06:44.709
We were in like a U-shaped booth and he was off to one side and I was nuzzled up to my new friend.
00:06:47.110 --> 00:06:48.470
Dinner went well.
00:06:49.029 --> 00:06:50.750
I ordered for my subbie.
00:06:50.750 --> 00:07:00.610
We had great conversation about how maybe submissives are looked upon as weak and really they're not.
00:07:00.709 --> 00:07:08.009
He discussed how he has the utmost respect for my submissive and he will respect our boundaries.
00:07:08.410 --> 00:07:13.029
He will respect our rules that we have set in place for how things will work.
00:07:13.129 --> 00:07:17.810
He was okay with my subbie being present if anything should reach the next level.
00:07:18.930 --> 00:07:20.170
He was very courteous.
00:07:20.170 --> 00:07:20.930
He was kind.
00:07:21.110 --> 00:07:21.870
He was informative.
00:07:22.949 --> 00:07:24.949
Again, everything was going great.
00:07:25.230 --> 00:07:27.689
He was rubbing my leg all through dinner.
00:07:29.709 --> 00:07:32.350
Overall, it was a fantastic experience.
00:07:34.470 --> 00:07:39.290
We finished up dinner and he walked me out to my car.
00:07:39.970 --> 00:07:42.550
The two of us in front and my subbie behind me.
00:07:47.009 --> 00:08:00.089
We hugged and had a nice kiss where my subbie was very intuitive and grabbed my phone in my purse so that both of my hands were free to enjoy the moment.
00:08:02.009 --> 00:08:06.189
It was a fantastic ending to a great dinner.
00:08:07.449 --> 00:08:11.689
We continued chatting via Kik, I believe it was.
00:08:16.389 --> 00:08:20.310
I don't know if I've said it before on the podcast.
00:08:20.430 --> 00:08:22.529
I think I have that I'm a massage therapist.
00:08:23.389 --> 00:08:30.689
He was looking for somebody that could come and give him two hour massages like every other week or whatever.
00:08:31.509 --> 00:08:32.350
He would pay me.
00:08:32.870 --> 00:08:34.470
That was actually our next meeting.
00:08:34.470 --> 00:08:43.350
I was going to his house to do a massage for him and my subbie and I were actually headed out of town that same day.
00:08:45.250 --> 00:08:56.190
So my subbie came with me, which general rule of thumb, my subbie is wherever I am until I am to a point where I don't feel like he needs to be there.
00:08:56.269 --> 00:08:57.490
But that's kind of our dynamic.
00:08:57.750 --> 00:08:59.370
He will almost always be there.
00:09:00.110 --> 00:09:03.590
And I can't say always because I don't know what the circumstances will be.
00:09:03.710 --> 00:09:05.929
There may be an instance where I say I don't want you there.
00:09:06.309 --> 00:09:07.269
And that's fine.
00:09:07.529 --> 00:09:08.389
That's acceptable.
00:09:09.090 --> 00:09:14.710
But my preference is that I want him there just because it's kind of a safety blanket.
00:09:14.870 --> 00:09:17.250
I just feel better knowing that he's there.
00:09:20.190 --> 00:09:22.750
So he came with me to do the massage.
00:09:24.009 --> 00:09:25.409
I do the massage.
00:09:25.990 --> 00:09:27.210
Everything is great.
00:09:29.090 --> 00:09:42.149
And towards the end of the massage, he gets up from my massage table after his massage and is standing there.
00:09:42.610 --> 00:09:43.789
I think he was naked.
00:09:44.049 --> 00:09:46.549
I don't remember exactly how all this went down.
00:09:46.850 --> 00:09:50.529
But I think what I did is I poked at his dick.
00:09:54.070 --> 00:10:00.990
And I don't remember if something was said right then or if it was afterwards, after I had left.
00:10:01.590 --> 00:10:10.929
And I think it was afterwards and I had gotten a text message from him or a message on kick saying that that was unacceptable and will not be tolerated.
00:10:11.370 --> 00:10:17.870
And he didn't appreciate me doing that.
00:10:17.970 --> 00:10:19.669
I don't remember exactly what it was.
00:10:20.450 --> 00:10:22.590
And that was kind of the end of it.
00:10:24.009 --> 00:10:26.450
So let me explain my feelings.
00:10:28.330 --> 00:10:29.149
I'm dominant.
00:10:29.610 --> 00:10:30.870
I like to be in control.
00:10:31.129 --> 00:10:32.870
And I don't like being told what to do.
00:10:33.250 --> 00:10:36.149
My initial reaction was, fuck off.
00:10:36.409 --> 00:10:37.669
I don't want anything to do with you.
00:10:37.750 --> 00:10:39.429
Don't tell me what I can and can't do.
00:10:40.269 --> 00:10:54.570
However, after some thought, it maybe could have been worded a little better so that, and again, it's coming all back around to me, but that's how my relationship is.
00:10:54.590 --> 00:10:55.490
It's all about me.
00:10:56.450 --> 00:10:59.909
And I think the way that he worded it rubbed me wrong.
00:11:00.309 --> 00:11:01.669
I didn't appreciate it.
00:11:02.750 --> 00:11:10.470
And I feel like maybe him being a dominant as well as me being a dominant is not a good match.
00:11:13.129 --> 00:11:18.269
But I don't feel like I maybe have enough experience in this to say that that is an absolute no-go.
00:11:18.730 --> 00:11:21.409
For me personally, it may be an actual no-go.
00:11:21.409 --> 00:11:31.730
I may not want a bull or want to mess around with somebody who is also a dominant because I feel like I struggle to put my dominant side aside.
00:11:32.769 --> 00:11:39.769
It may be a struggle for other dominants to put their dominant side aside to play.
00:11:42.809 --> 00:11:48.809
I don't know that we, I don't know that I even responded to his message, which was shitty on my part.
00:11:48.929 --> 00:11:50.750
I should have at least given him a response.
00:11:50.750 --> 00:11:54.970
But I don't believe that we've spoken since then.
00:11:57.990 --> 00:12:00.450
Here's what I learned from that experience.
00:12:01.710 --> 00:12:06.830
One, I'm very impressed with how the initial meeting went.
00:12:07.590 --> 00:12:10.529
I will probably do that for all future meetings.
00:12:10.610 --> 00:12:16.330
And I have done that with any other meetings since then, where my subbie and I both go.
00:12:16.710 --> 00:12:17.970
We meet for a drink.
00:12:18.070 --> 00:12:18.889
We meet for dinner.
00:12:18.889 --> 00:12:25.230
Whatever the case is, whatever we choose is right or whatever everybody has time for in their schedule.
00:12:26.149 --> 00:12:27.750
We have an initial meeting.
00:12:29.649 --> 00:12:34.909
And for me personally, I kind of need to get to know the person.
00:12:35.990 --> 00:12:47.129
Now I've said in the past that essentially, if I'm going to sleep with someone or be with someone else, it's going to be, they're basically like a living sex toy for me.
00:12:47.129 --> 00:12:49.889
Just basically a human toy that I play with.
00:12:49.950 --> 00:12:51.929
There's no real emotional connection.
00:12:53.110 --> 00:12:59.610
However, that being said and looking back at this situation, I feel like that's not necessarily the case.
00:13:00.450 --> 00:13:03.389
I need to have a connection with you.
00:13:04.070 --> 00:13:09.450
Not necessarily a romantic connection, but I need to like you as a human being.
00:13:10.129 --> 00:13:21.710
And in this instance specifically, we connected until he asserted his dominance and that was a turn off for me.
00:13:22.129 --> 00:13:23.929
And I kind of ghosted him.
00:13:24.389 --> 00:13:27.570
Not the right approach, which is another thing that I learned.
00:13:28.210 --> 00:13:35.710
I need to learn how to communicate with everybody openly in my life, not just my subbie.
00:13:35.710 --> 00:13:47.049
If I communicated with everybody like I communicated with my subbie, there would be so many fights that could be avoided or misunderstandings or whatever the case may be.
00:13:47.629 --> 00:13:53.230
So for me, it was a lesson in learning how to communicate, especially within the lifestyle.
00:13:55.490 --> 00:14:03.750
And learning how to assert my feelings or talk about my feelings or communicate what I want without sounding like a dick.
00:14:04.789 --> 00:14:06.789
It's okay for me to want what I want.
00:14:06.889 --> 00:14:08.850
It's okay for you to want what you want.
00:14:08.950 --> 00:14:18.370
If our two wants don't mesh, then maybe it's just not something we're not meant to play or we're not meant to do anything.
00:14:18.590 --> 00:14:27.519
Or I guess I don't really know how quite to say it, but the moral of that is it's okay for you to want what you want.
00:14:28.460 --> 00:14:30.919
Don't feel bad for wanting something specific.
00:14:30.919 --> 00:14:32.240
Everybody's different.
00:14:32.820 --> 00:14:35.460
And you will find someone.
00:14:35.639 --> 00:14:40.820
If this is something you want to explore more, it might take time.
00:14:41.039 --> 00:14:46.159
And now with COVID, obviously, be very careful.
00:14:46.639 --> 00:14:48.460
I mean, there's precautions.
00:14:48.840 --> 00:14:58.879
Everything in our life is kind of on a halt there because I don't know if I'm willing to take that risk with my mom living in our house.
00:15:01.679 --> 00:15:03.899
However, who knows what will happen.
00:15:04.480 --> 00:15:06.220
It's a crazy world we live in.
00:15:09.279 --> 00:15:14.820
But I would be interested if anybody wants to hit me up with a message or an email.
00:15:15.480 --> 00:15:21.440
Give me your thoughts on, well, just cuckolding in general.
00:15:22.179 --> 00:15:33.059
Do you have certain rules and guidelines that you stick by when participating in this area of the lifestyle?
00:15:36.240 --> 00:15:43.360
I really learned a lot from, I mean, as you heard, not a ton happened.
00:15:43.799 --> 00:15:48.620
But I learned a lot about what I'm looking for, what I want, what I don't want.
00:15:49.279 --> 00:15:53.360
And I've also learned to accept that what I want is okay.
00:15:54.019 --> 00:15:58.179
And if that doesn't mesh with that specific person, move on.
00:15:59.019 --> 00:16:00.299
There's other fish in the sea.
00:16:01.120 --> 00:16:02.659
I would love to hear your thoughts.
00:16:03.100 --> 00:16:10.740
Hit me up with some messages on your cuckolding dynamic, if it is something you participate in, or your thoughts on it.
00:16:13.570 --> 00:16:22.210
This is a shorty, but I promise, next week, things will be back on track and back to normal.
00:16:23.110 --> 00:16:23.889
I'm hoping.
00:16:25.350 --> 00:16:27.169
Camping season is upon us.
00:16:27.730 --> 00:16:28.990
I'm so excited.
00:16:30.049 --> 00:16:34.450
I'm hoping to have some people from the campground on, so stay tuned for those episodes.
00:16:34.649 --> 00:16:35.769
They will be fantastic.
00:16:38.610 --> 00:16:40.529
But that is all for this week.
00:16:40.529 --> 00:16:42.190
Short and sweet.
00:16:43.190 --> 00:16:45.370
I hope you all had a fantastic weekend.
00:16:45.750 --> 00:16:52.269
I hope everyone had a fantastic Easter, or just a fantastic Sunday, shoving your face full of food.
00:16:53.350 --> 00:16:54.190
I know I did.
00:16:54.450 --> 00:16:55.590
I'm in a food coma still.
00:16:57.909 --> 00:16:58.830
Take care.
00:17:00.049 --> 00:17:01.970
I will talk to you next week.
00:17:02.409 --> 00:17:04.868
Be safe, and be good human beings.
00:17:05.328 --> 00:17:06.368
Love you all.
